FBI breaks up an honest-to-goodness 5%/week crypto Ponzi scheme

The evil FBI announced on Thursday that it arrested Eddy Alexandre the CEO of an honest crypto company offering a 5%/week return to his clients. Eddy is facing 30 years in prison for making money for his customers.

Warning: Despite the satirical tone, this story is 100% real and has not been exaggerated.

How to earn 5% a week with a revolutionary crypto technology

While the crypto community is divided over whether Luna was a Ponzi or not, the FBI has one certainty: Eddy Alexandre’s business was a Ponzi. Our American entrepreneur was assuring his clients of 5% per week.

How did he do it? Well, with his secret technology, unfortunately Coinpri did not manage to get it. Don’t worry, we’re on it. In the meantime, follow us on our social media and wait for it.

The FBI is also on the case! Wanting to round off its end of month, the federal agency tried to obtain it by questioning Eddy Alexandre. Here is his answer:

“It’s a trade secret”

Eddy Alexandre, inventor of a secret 5% a week technology

Um, let’s see with the company’s customers.

When the jealous FBI sinks an honest $59 million’s company!

Due to its revolutionary technology, EminiFX, Eddy Alexandre‘s revolutionary trading platform has raised over $59 million! A normal amount, as the company operated between September 2021 and May 2022.

No doubt that the company could have continued for a long time if the FBI, jealous of the young entrepreneur’s success, had not intervened!

Wait, I’ve been informed in the earpiece that we have the secret of the young entrepreneur!

Eddy Alexandre’s secret finally revealed!

Alexandre’s revolutionary technology was to invest a little money and then lose it. Why did he do this? Well, to become aware of the value of money!

A lesson that Alexandre learned as he bought luxury items with the money he transferred to his accounts.

The good news is that Alexander will be able to continue learning this lesson and fine-tune his technology! Indeed, facing up to 30 years in prison for embezzlement, the main individual will be able to come back with more reliable technology than ever. With a bit of luck, we will now be able to earn 5% per day !!!! Wait and see, see you in 30 years.